Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Homeschooling in the news!

This in particular resonated with me:

"Julieanne Hensley, of Cincinnati, says she decided to home-school her children precisely because of the kind of socialization they would get in school.
Hensley went to Catholic school and said her studious, bookworm personality made her "bully bait."
"It's like 'Lord of the Flies,'" Hensley said of the social life at traditional schools. "The idea that kids have to deal with bullies is absurd. Adults don't have to in their lives."
Tamara Knowles agreed, saying that, in many cases, public schooling can tear down a child's self-esteem. "It happened to me," she said. "Other kids will taunt you, tease you. That socialization is not good — it's group think. If you're different, and I hope my kids are, you're going to get a lot of that."

See, that is kind of my answer to the whole "socialization" thing. I was one of the kids who were beat up on it school- why in the world would I think my kids were missing out?

Monday, August 29, 2005

Silly Turbo

I don't let the kidlets watch much TV, but this week we watched Monty Python's The Holy Grail; and The Princess Bride. Turbo has been climbing onto tables, doing a "Knights of the Round Table" routine. It's precious. He has also been running around with a stick declaring, "My name is Arroz Con Pollo. You kill my father. Prepare to die". It really is too cute for words.

Sunday, August 28, 2005

Six months today

and HRH happened to pick the dress we bought her fot the memorial to go to church today. Ah, my soul. She says his ghost haunts the church. No one has noticed this anniversary, and I may be too busy to do what I need.

Saturday, August 27, 2005

Bye, bye this here Anakin guy

Turbo has been obsessing over the Weird Al song "The Saga Begins". (lyrics: ) . The really amusing thing is that he has heard "American Pie" enough times to confuse the two. And he has a charming light saber dance to go with the song.

Yesterday HRH was telling me she needed a twenty sided for the Star Wars game book she's reading. Now, she claims fairies aren't geeks, but I say any 6 year old who knows to ask for a twenty sided is a geek.

Them, while we were at a yard sale today a lady offered us a D&D shirt foe half of what she was asking, becuase she could tell we were gamers. How? Do we really look that geeky?

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Staring down 6 months

Last night I tossed and turned, remembereing holding Baby Boy and kissing him. Today when looking for someone's e-mail address I came across all the messages sent me after his death, and I started re-reading them. I'm having trouble breathing; how can I get through this?

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

My YA review for the month

I've read a few YA books this month, for various reasons

LoneStarMa sent me the book "Baby" by Patricia MacLachlan. Actually it's for the kids, but I read it first. The main character, Larkin, had recently lost a baby brother at birth. I put it where Boy Caesar will find it, it's wonderfully written.

Another is titled "Don't hurt Laurie" ( I have a small one on my lap and can't go look up the author). It's about a girl whi os being physically abused by her mother. I found the ending dissapointing- maybe this comes from the " abused kid who never saw justice" perspective, but after reading about this mother attacking her daughter with a knife and fireplace poker, I wanted to see her go to jail, not just get counseling.

Oh, and Harry Potter is evil. Not in the ways that conservatives tend to think...but after reading about all those Hogwarts breakfasts, I am totally craving bacon. Evil, I tell you.

Friday, August 19, 2005

And off we go....

Off on my first trip to Seattle in months. I don't think I've driven up there since September. Off to meet some cyber-friends and go to the Science Center.

I saw some counting bears at a yard sale, and wanted to buy them, but I just knew if I did one or more of the kids would claim they are Gummi bears and eat them. Sigh.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005


Monday, August 15, 2005

Holding back entropy

If I can hold back entropy, just a little, I may keep my sanity. Everything feels broken, and when we have broken things that need fixed or replaced and we don't that drags me down, way down. I want a working vaccuum, is that too much to ask? Today I touched up HRH's room, and that felt good, like something major. By touched up, I mean to paint over her drawings. I used the last of her paint, and no way will the job stand up to even a slightly less than casual inspection, but it looks better. Now, to tackle the boys' room. WE have pwimer, don't think we have paint, but it's a plce to start. Maybe starting to prime their room on their own will force the Warlord into action. I hate trying to hold back entropy on my own.

Friday, August 12, 2005

Really, really down

I had a dream that I was going to a grove where people went when they knew they were dying, and their loved ones would go see them on their way. I went to sleep and kept waiting to wake up on the other side...but didn't. That was a few days ago and I have been barely functioning, going through the motions since then. I feel so hopeless, hopeless to even give my living kids the happy childhood they deserve. I want to turn back the clock.

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Faire and Flo

We're in the middle of Faire, and HRH and I have talked about maybe becoming roving merchants selling- what else- handmade faerie tiaras. Are we nuts? I know there are kits for them, how hard can it be?

Aunt Flo is here, and I hate her so much. Now she's not just inconvenient, she's a terrible, painful reminder of so much. I see now why some women go for elective hysterectomies. It's very tempting.

Friday, August 05, 2005

On the line

I put up a clothesline last month, and have found hanging lundry to be very meditative. One thing I have meditated on is how radical an act this can be. Sure, I save a little money, but if time is money, it's not enough to justify it. But think about it. When you hang your clothes, you are utilising an alternate energy source, right in your backyard. It's an environmental statement. It's also rejecting the paradigm in our society that convenience is more important than doing what's best for the planet. That's always a radical statement. And when you are hanging not only the cloth diapers, but the mama cloth made from old diapers-that's truly challanging the paradigm.
And your clothes smell so much better to boot.

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Currently Reading

My books in progress list is kind of long now. I usually read two at a time.

Let's see:

Plan B: Some further thoughts on faith by Anne Lamott

I read her books faster than about any other.

Beyond Tears-Living after losing a child Even though the mamas writing this lost adult children, it's good to hear these stories. I'll survive this.

I'm re-reading Goblet of Fire, and also reading Sorcerer's Stone to HRH for her bedtime story. One chapter at a time, 6 books- this should last us at least a year. I love reading bedtime stories, but hate waiting 10 minutes for a kid to choose one.

These are the days of our lives

Today when we were driving HRH to her last day of theatre camp, I played Queen for the first time in months. I used to play them on the long drives to my midwife, and this is the first time I have wanted to since. Unfortunately the drive takes us past the funeral home, so this was a memories moment. I start crying a little as I drive, and the kids are all in the back oblivious, Boy Caesar and Neighbor boy are trying to engage me in conversation about Magic decks, but I just want everyone to be quiet.

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Another proud geek-parenting moment

Yesterday, the Warlord started teaching HRH The Fairy Princess how to play Magic the Gathering. She now fits the criteria to play- she can read and do simple computations. JHe made her a fairy/merfolk deck he's been working on for several years. They played Two Headed Giant with Boy Caesar and Neighbor Boy, and the sweet girlie won her first game. I haven't been so proud since Turbo learned to say, "Luke, I am your father".

Tuesday, August 02, 2005


Yesterday I took the boys for a walk while HRH was at theatre camp. Boy Caesar wanted to pick blackberries, and even had a basket, so we picked some. Later after picking up HRH from camp, we stopped at Trader Joe's. The cashier, who I only see once a month or so, said I looked like I was doing better. He must know something I don't.
The we went to the blueberry farm. they had so much fun, and the berries were the type that are perfect for baking. These are the things I need to do more often.