Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Because I don't want to buy new pants: On deciding not to be content

I've gained 15 pounds in the last year.

A little backstory, for those who need to be brought up to date. For the past two years, I've been dealing with a cluster of issues: constipation broken up by the occasional unpredictable and raging opposite, abdominal pain, a growing list of food intolerances, and a loss of fitness level. And this weight thing. Despite my issues, I was at a size I was happy with just a summer ago. But last year, really in the few months following my 40th birthday, I put on all this weight.

This is something I have brought up to my doctor at the last two "Can we finally figure out what the Hell is wrong with me visits?"/ At the last visit, last week, she said what people would love or would hate to hear"

"Maybe your body is just happy at this weight."

I know many people for whom this would be all they need to hear. "Awesome! I can keep doing what I'm doing and it's all good!" In fact, I'm pretty sure this is the Standard Accepted Response, because to think otherwise would be size-ist and all that.

Yet, my response is: "I don't think so.Time to step up my game"

Before you think my reasons are *all* vain, consider this. I've lived in this body for years, and have grown accustomed to eating a certain way and exercising a certain way and therefore, maintaining a certain weight. And yes, maybe turning 40 flipped some magical switch that made that inadequate, but to have it in conjunction with a suite of symptoms that mainly seem gut related? It would be foolish for me to dismiss a link.If nothing else, cutting back my portions a bit more while exercising more between now and the next appointment in a few weeks may help shed light on that.
Then there's the practical. A friend recently descried his decision to lose weight as :"I had to lose weight or buy new pants, and I'm too cheap to buy new pants". As a cheapskate myself, I relate. I have a stack of pants I can't wear. Not all of them were $1.29 Goodwill tag sale finds, either: some I paid  as much as $10 for. Because I worked so hard to get into them. I don't want my hard work to go to waste. And to be perfectly honest, I'm tired of wearing my "period pants" for everyday.
So yes, for the time being, I will be watching my portions more and taking time to work out more.


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